Day 0.5- Pre-Op Jitters
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| from http://joejackphotography.com/ |
And I've had my first bout of insomnia (which is really fun; you should try it) and late-night anxiety due to a low-simmering terror over my impending tonsillectomy.
Which is why I'm writing now. I figured I would start a post about my surgery and document my experience for anyone else planning or preparing to have this surgery done-- especially as an adult. If you're not interested, that's cool. We can still be friends.
Day 0.5: Pre-Op Procedures:
The
hospital called yesterday to let me know they would be calling today
with my surgery time. Which just served to make me anxious. She also
mentioned no food/drink after midnight (standard procedure) and then she
said something that has given me pause: "wear loose fitting,
comfortable clothes that can be easily taken off and put on." |
| from gownies.com |
As I said, I've been experiencing some pre-operation insomnia and anxiety, so that's been fun. I'm looking forward to sleeping for a couple of days while taking heavy-duty painkillers. Though, I'm NOT looking forward to the liquid diet. I love food. I really love eating food. I'm going to be very lonely for food...
Today, I'll be doing a few errands to get ready. I'll be buying more pebble ice from the grocery store (the butcher has it, who knew?), as well as lots of soft, baby-like foods. I'll also be writing down how to make a good strawberry smoothie. And I'll be cleaning the family room and bathroom that will be used post-op to recover.
I also need to buy freezer bags and/or a refillable ice pack, so I'm prepared for all the cold treatment I'll require. I've read that it's good to ice the throat and ears the first couple of days to reduce pain and swelling. Goody.
Here we go.
EDITED: I forgot to mention that my doctor is a specialist in the newer Coblation method, which uses a radio frequency and saline solution at room temperature rather than a scalpel or the more popular electro-cauterize at 400 degrees method. Supposedly the recovery (especially the first 3 days) is MUCH better with Coblation, as there is a lot less tissue damage, etc. Just keep that in mind as I whine and fuss. It could be worse.
Surgery and Recovery: Day 1
I got to the hospital at 10:30 and signed in and waited...
Then I got weighed and such by a nurse, who took us to a room and told me to put on hospital issue pajama bottoms, remove everything from the waist up (she said it's so they can attach a heart monitor-- I guess Kriss wasn't too far off in his joke) and put on the standard so-called "gown".
Then we waited some more...
Soon another nurse came in and caused me a ridiculous amount of pain putting an IV into my hand. I didn't know getting an IV could hurt that much! IV's I've had in the past didn't, so maybe I was just hyper sensitive today. I didn't cry, though, and the pain settled into being tolerable discomfort after a bit.
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| The only selfie you'll see of me pre-surgery. The IV of Pain. |
Then we waited longer... like a half hour.
Finally, a tech came and had me sit on a different rolly bed, and took me on a tour of the hospital. I swear, we went down every hallway there. Then, he left me in a hallway. With the bed cage sides up, in case I decided to make a run for it. I think I sat there for about 20 minutes. Fortunately, all the employees at this hospital are very nice and many stopped to ask me if I was warm enough and would I like another blanket. Still, I was bored.
Eventually, my surgeon came by and reassured me, mentioned that I would have a very sore throat (duh).Shortly after he disappeared, the young, pretty, lady anesthesiologist arrived and explained what she would be doing, then she gave me something to relax me and wheeled me into the operating room.
Looking up at the ceiling's collection of UFOs, I felt like I was on a TV show or something. At one point, before I slipped into blackness, I realized they had STRAPPED ME DOWN. My legs were under a strap and the nurse sweetly asked me to lay my arms down by my sides one at a time, and she proceeded to gently wrap something around them. Luckily, I didn't have a chance (or the inclination) to panic, because believe me, I WOULD HAVE. I'm not okay with being strapped down while conscious.
* * *
The
next thing I knew I was awake and very anxious and crying. Yep. I'm a
crier, including during my coming-out-of-anesthesia experience. I then
felt embarrassed that I was crying. The nurse with me was very kind and
understanding, and she gave me something for my anxiety (I don't know
what), and then my throat hurt, so she brought me some ice which was
like HEAVEN. You know how you can't eat or drink after midnight then
night before surgery? It been like 14 or more hours since I had a decent
drink of water and I was so thirsty! And pepple ice? The best thing
ever. (Which my dear friend Nancy and I called "deer poo ice" because...
you figure it out.)
Once
I stopped crying and dozing, and I was good and iced up, I got to
go to a recovery room where my husband joined me. Talking to him about
how I felt made me tear up again, so I concentrated on eating all the
pebble ice in the hospital instead.
And then we checked out and came home.
My
throat hurts, but not horrifically. I'd say about a level 2 (out of 10)
constantly and a 5 when I swallow. It feels like a bad case of Strep or
a horrible cold today.
I KNOW IT'S GOING TO GET WORSE
But
I'm hoping that it will be manageable. I have an ice pack from the
hospital that my hubby keeps refilling for me-- I'm keeping it tied
around my chin against my throat (I look like I have mumps) and I'm
drinking loads of ice-filled water and it seems to be helping keep the
pain to a minimum.
I
set a timer and I'll be taking my meds every 4 hours like clockwork;
I'm chewing gum now that I'm done eating (oh my gosh, watermelon is the
tastiest thing I think I've ever had-- thank you to the neighbor who
brought my family dinner, because watermelon turned out to be SO much
yummier than applesauce!!); and I will be icing, icing, icing for at
least the next two days as well. It does hurt when I talk too much, so
I'm doing a lot of gesturing to get people to come closer so I can
whisper to them. This is very odd. I need a bell or something to get
their attention in the first place...
The verdict? So far so good.
Oh, and my doctor told my husband that taking out the evil traitor tonsils was a good move. He said they were riddled
with pockets filled with bacteria and that I will absolutely benefit
from having taken them out. I like to have my decisions validated--
especially in something like this where you might not ever know...
And
as soon as I was home and settled in the recliner, my daughter's sweet
kitty came to find me and snuggle on my lap for a while. Made my day.
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| Holly, my lap kitty. |
Day 2
I spent last night
in my husband's recliner and woke up about every hour to use the
bathroom, as well as whenever my iPad alarm went off to keep me on my
schedule for pain meds. I don't want to get behind on them, because they
seem to be doing the job, so although I'm super tired today, it's worth
it.
I've also been icing my neck a lot, and I think that (in addition to drinking loads of icy water) has helped prevent severe swelling in my throat.
So far, so good. I'm anticipating that tomorrow will be the worst, if the internet is correct-- everyone says day 3 was the most horrible. At the risk of jinxing myself, I haven't really had any pain above a level 3. I'm shocked by this, and very grateful. My throat feels about like I have Strep. Which is ironic, since that's kind of what started this whole thing...
I am feeling super loopy and tired, though. I'm sure the combination of not sleeping for more than an hour at a time and the pain meds and the less-than-adequate caloric intake are all contributing to the feeling of light-headedness. Since I'm not in severe pain, though, I don't mind. I'm just resting and letting my kids take care of me (Kriss had to work today, but will be off for the next 3.)
I've been able to eat okay today-- I had half of a very soft hamburger bun in the night with my meds (it took me like 20 minutes to eat it!) and today I've had oatmeal and watermelon and popsicles and an orange ice cream bar. It's tricky finding things I can eat that won't tear up my throat that are filling and taste good. Soft foods are so boring!
And that's today's update... not much to say.
Day 3-
Rumor has it that day 3 is the usually the worst day when recovering from a tonsillectomy. So, in anticipation of this, I was prepared for severe pain and misery. Imagine my shock when I woke up this morning without any pain in my throat! My uvula is swollen, which is very... ODD, and I have some soreness still in the back of my throat, but it's mild and tolerable.
The day is almost over now, and I haven't had above a level 1 pain in my throat all day. I am very weak and tired, due to the continued combination of waking up every few hours for meds all night long and the meds themselves making me loopy, but I'm looking forward to tapering back the meds beginning tomorrow if I am still in the low-pain area.
I feel very blessed to not be totally miserable today. Whatever the reason is, I'm happy for it. I have spent the day being visited by family members bearing treats and flowers, and resting a lot. I have similar plans for the next two days, as well.
I may have over-done it talking today, since I had visitors, so I might have to ice my neck again tonight, if it feels extra uncomfortable, but if not, I stopped using the ice packs last night and I hope I won't need them anymore. I'm still drinking icy water constantly, which is like icing it from the inside.
UPDATE-
Day 4:
Today hasn't been too bad, uncomfortable; not especially painful, but as the day has progressed, it has gotten slightly worse. I think this is because I cut my prescription pain meds to the smaller dosage today. I'm still taking my ibuprofen, and I'm not miserable, but there is some notable discomfort. My uvula is still swollen (ick) and my body still feels weak and sick, so I'm just resting and taking it easy.
I'm still feeling grateful that my pain hasn't been unbearable. I haven't been in agony at all since the surgery, and I haven't really suffered. I consider myself very lucky!
I was hoping that since the pain yesterday had lessened, that it was a sign of healing happening, but I guess the normal routine is to feel better for a day or two and then to have more days of pain and misery.
Truthfully, though, I haven't had as much pain as I expected, so I'm trying not to complain. But I'm not a very patient patient. I don't want to feel better then worse then better then worse before being 100% better.
I will manage, though.
Day 6- OUCH! I have had a lot more pain today than any day since my surgery. I'm annoyed by the need to take the full dose of pain medication, because it makes me so tired and dizzy and light-headed. I don't like having to spend day after day after day just resting and sitting here. Normally, I would look forward to time spent relaxing and resting, but this is boring and frustrating. Not to mention that I'm in a lot of pain.
Day 7- Lots of pain again today-- on and off. I'm taking the max doses of both my prescription and ibuprofen, and that seems to help. I had to take my daughter to the doctor today-- she's got Strep Throat (good timing, eh?) so I had to function a little bit, and it was probably good for me to get out of the house for a minute. The pain levels today ranged from a 1 to a 4 or 5. It was pretty painful this morning. Tomorrow marks one week since surgery, so I hope it also marks the beginning of the downhill slide into healing.
Day 8: Shoot me
now. I have been in such horrible pain today and I'm running low on
meds, so I'm taking just one pill at a time instead of 2, and it hurts.
So so so hurts. Tonight, while doing the salt water rinse, I spit out
some phlegm and there was blood. So I switched to cold water and gargled
and spit a few more times, and there was some blood. I also horked out
something nasty, which I can only assume was one of my scabs. I won't
describe it. It was really disgusting.
Since there was some blood (even just a small amount) I decided to stop taking ibuprofen for a while until I was sure it wasn't going to continue bleeding.
And I paid for it. Such horrible, sharp pain in my throat. And one of my ears has begun to ache, just a little. I can barely feel it, though. I'm back to icing my neck as much as possible and mostly just sipping ice water. I hardly ate anything today at all.
Day 9: More of the same. My throat is killing me, my ear is a little bothered, and I'm beginning to wonder if I will ever be done with this ordeal. Having pain day after day after day, and not sleeping in my bed, and waking up in the night to take pain meds, and SITTING AROUND all day every day for over a week is rather depressing. I feel discouraged and frustrated and angry and mostly miserable.
I haven't had any more bleeding today, so I'm going to add ibuprofen back in tonight. Also, I called and was given a partial refill on my pain meds, which should get me through the last few days of agony.
Lord help me, I hope it works.
Something else unpleasant, but common following surgery: I did experience some constipation-- I didn't have a "movement" for a whole week, so I started taking a stool softener the evening of day 7. Yesterday evening and into today, things seem to be slowly returning to normal in that area...
Day 10: Still very painful. So very painful. Miserable. My dear friend Nancy sent me some beautiful flowers that arrived today and helped cheer me up, though. I'm so tired of being in pain and sitting and sleeping in this stupid recliner. I'm so tired of not doing anything. I did get up and clean one room and wash one load of laundry, but then I needed to sit/lay back down and rest. Nice. I feel like a feeble old lady! So frustrating.
Day 11
Ugh. Still hurts a lot. Still feeling tired and lazy and bored and annoyed. I feel like there is something jammed in my throat that I can't clear-- I'm not trying too hard, it's very sore back there and still scabby, so I don't want to hurt the tender area by coughing hard or anything, but it's like an itch I can't scratch.
I've also been icing my neck a lot, and I think that (in addition to drinking loads of icy water) has helped prevent severe swelling in my throat.
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| from EmaCartoon.com |
So far, so good. I'm anticipating that tomorrow will be the worst, if the internet is correct-- everyone says day 3 was the most horrible. At the risk of jinxing myself, I haven't really had any pain above a level 3. I'm shocked by this, and very grateful. My throat feels about like I have Strep. Which is ironic, since that's kind of what started this whole thing...
I am feeling super loopy and tired, though. I'm sure the combination of not sleeping for more than an hour at a time and the pain meds and the less-than-adequate caloric intake are all contributing to the feeling of light-headedness. Since I'm not in severe pain, though, I don't mind. I'm just resting and letting my kids take care of me (Kriss had to work today, but will be off for the next 3.)
I've been able to eat okay today-- I had half of a very soft hamburger bun in the night with my meds (it took me like 20 minutes to eat it!) and today I've had oatmeal and watermelon and popsicles and an orange ice cream bar. It's tricky finding things I can eat that won't tear up my throat that are filling and taste good. Soft foods are so boring!
And that's today's update... not much to say.
Days 3 & 4
Rumor has it that day 3 is the usually the worst day when recovering from a tonsillectomy. So, in anticipation of this, I was prepared for severe pain and misery. Imagine my shock when I woke up this morning without any pain in my throat! My uvula is swollen, which is very... ODD, and I have some soreness still in the back of my throat, but it's mild and tolerable.
The day is almost over now, and I haven't had above a level 1 pain in my throat all day. I am very weak and tired, due to the continued combination of waking up every few hours for meds all night long and the meds themselves making me loopy, but I'm looking forward to tapering back the meds beginning tomorrow if I am still in the low-pain area.
I feel very blessed to not be totally miserable today. Whatever the reason is, I'm happy for it. I have spent the day being visited by family members bearing treats and flowers, and resting a lot. I have similar plans for the next two days, as well.
I may have over-done it talking today, since I had visitors, so I might have to ice my neck again tonight, if it feels extra uncomfortable, but if not, I stopped using the ice packs last night and I hope I won't need them anymore. I'm still drinking icy water constantly, which is like icing it from the inside.
UPDATE-
Day 4:
Today hasn't been too bad, uncomfortable; not especially painful, but as the day has progressed, it has gotten slightly worse. I think this is because I cut my prescription pain meds to the smaller dosage today. I'm still taking my ibuprofen, and I'm not miserable, but there is some notable discomfort. My uvula is still swollen (ick) and my body still feels weak and sick, so I'm just resting and taking it easy.
I'm still feeling grateful that my pain hasn't been unbearable. I haven't been in agony at all since the surgery, and I haven't really suffered. I consider myself very lucky!
Days 5, 6 & 7
Day 5- Pain again.
I woke up this morning in quite a lot of pain in my throat and all over
the back of my mouth (I'm not sure what they stuck and jabbed around my
mouth with, but it's left behind some soreness!) My uvula is still
swollen, and it hurts when I talk, yawn, or swallow. Fun times. I'm back
on full meds and ice packs all the time.I was hoping that since the pain yesterday had lessened, that it was a sign of healing happening, but I guess the normal routine is to feel better for a day or two and then to have more days of pain and misery.
Truthfully, though, I haven't had as much pain as I expected, so I'm trying not to complain. But I'm not a very patient patient. I don't want to feel better then worse then better then worse before being 100% better.
I will manage, though.
Day 6- OUCH! I have had a lot more pain today than any day since my surgery. I'm annoyed by the need to take the full dose of pain medication, because it makes me so tired and dizzy and light-headed. I don't like having to spend day after day after day just resting and sitting here. Normally, I would look forward to time spent relaxing and resting, but this is boring and frustrating. Not to mention that I'm in a lot of pain.
Day 7- Lots of pain again today-- on and off. I'm taking the max doses of both my prescription and ibuprofen, and that seems to help. I had to take my daughter to the doctor today-- she's got Strep Throat (good timing, eh?) so I had to function a little bit, and it was probably good for me to get out of the house for a minute. The pain levels today ranged from a 1 to a 4 or 5. It was pretty painful this morning. Tomorrow marks one week since surgery, so I hope it also marks the beginning of the downhill slide into healing.
Days 8, 9 & 10
Since there was some blood (even just a small amount) I decided to stop taking ibuprofen for a while until I was sure it wasn't going to continue bleeding.
And I paid for it. Such horrible, sharp pain in my throat. And one of my ears has begun to ache, just a little. I can barely feel it, though. I'm back to icing my neck as much as possible and mostly just sipping ice water. I hardly ate anything today at all.
Day 9: More of the same. My throat is killing me, my ear is a little bothered, and I'm beginning to wonder if I will ever be done with this ordeal. Having pain day after day after day, and not sleeping in my bed, and waking up in the night to take pain meds, and SITTING AROUND all day every day for over a week is rather depressing. I feel discouraged and frustrated and angry and mostly miserable.
I haven't had any more bleeding today, so I'm going to add ibuprofen back in tonight. Also, I called and was given a partial refill on my pain meds, which should get me through the last few days of agony.
Lord help me, I hope it works.
Something else unpleasant, but common following surgery: I did experience some constipation-- I didn't have a "movement" for a whole week, so I started taking a stool softener the evening of day 7. Yesterday evening and into today, things seem to be slowly returning to normal in that area...
Day 10: Still very painful. So very painful. Miserable. My dear friend Nancy sent me some beautiful flowers that arrived today and helped cheer me up, though. I'm so tired of being in pain and sitting and sleeping in this stupid recliner. I'm so tired of not doing anything. I did get up and clean one room and wash one load of laundry, but then I needed to sit/lay back down and rest. Nice. I feel like a feeble old lady! So frustrating.
Day 11
Ugh. Still hurts a lot. Still feeling tired and lazy and bored and annoyed. I feel like there is something jammed in my throat that I can't clear-- I'm not trying too hard, it's very sore back there and still scabby, so I don't want to hurt the tender area by coughing hard or anything, but it's like an itch I can't scratch.
If I accidentally miss a dose, even if I'm only 1/2 hour late, I can feel it. Bad. Especially since there's no way I can not talk. I have a family-- I have to talk.
So,
although I feel better overall, my throat still hurts. Especially when I
wake up for my meds. And I'm still sleeping in the stupid recliner.
Probably will be for another couple of nights.
But I'll get better.
Any day now...
A- The fact that I probably only slept about 4 hours total last night and that was broken up into smaller chunks of time
B- I stopped taking prescription meds this morning and I'm sticking to that good old Ibuprofen and Acetaminophen rotation.
C- I had to get up and drive people around today and then get up a bunch more times to help my daughter excavate her room to find items to take to camp tomorrow, even though I should still be on "bed rest".
D- Loss of sanity from all this "resting"
E- All of the above
I have HAD ENOUGH.
This morning I stopped the prescription meds because I realized the pain wasn't any worse just on IB and AC, and that's a good step in the right direction, but I don't care. It doesn't make me feel any better.
I look around and my house is a mess, there's no food in the fridge and my poor hubby has to come home and figure out dinner AGAIN and I'm beginning to have panic attacks about money and the lack thereof and then the van won't start?? I'm losing my mind.
I suppose it's interesting that I'm feeling depressed enough that everything is starting to look bleak and hopeless. Maybe tomorrow will be the day that I wake up with no pain and I will feel like a miracle has happened.
But when will I get my strength back? I'm so weak and exhausted.
I keep reading personal accounts online that say you aren't back to "normal" until 3 weeks post-op. Super. In the meantime, what isn't being done? What have I neglected or forgotten?
OHMYGOSH. In this moment, I just realized why I'm probably feeling dizzy and weepy and sick. I forgot to take my anxiety meds this morning!!! GAH! It's 6:30 p.m.!!! CRAP. It's one of those meds that you can't miss a dose without feeling bad effects. I think I missed yesterday's dose, too!
Super.
Dare I say "I think we've turned a corner?" Yes. I dare.
Although I don't feel anywhere near 100%, I feel much better than I have since this ordeal began. For one thing, my brain has stabilized, thankyouantianxietymeds, and for another, even though my throat still hurts, it's gone from mind-numbing, all-consuming torturous pain to a rather notable discomfort.
That's big.
So big, that I almost got out of bed and started doing lots of stuff today.
Then I remembered reading stories of people who did just that on the first day they started feeling better and then paid for it by having their knees buckle under them while at the grocery store, or by having a much worse day the next. So I'm doing a few things, but mostly I'm still going to take it easy, so I can truly, fully recover.
Last night, I slept in my bed instead of in the recliner. It took me a while to get settled and when I woke up at 4 a.m. for ibuprofen, my ears both ached a little, but now they feel fine. My pain in my throat level is probably only at a 1 or 2, and I'm still constantly sipping ice water to keep it there. I still have scabby areas and I'm not ready to eat those onion rings I've been craving, but soon. Soon soon soon.
I've been the recipient of such incredible love and generosity and kindness since my surgery, and I'm so very grateful to everyone who has brought in food and popsicles and sent or brought flowers an came to visit and especially for all the prayers on my behalf. I'm so glad I can finally see the light at the end of this ridiculously long tunnel.
I slept in my bed
again last night, but I woke up at 3:30 a.m. and after taking some
ibuprofen, I couldn't go back to sleep. I laid there for an hour,
finally gave up and went downstairs to the recliner. I didn't fall back
asleep, though, so I spent some time on the internet and then I got up
when the sun came up (the kitties were meowing to be let in) and did a
few light tasks, such as paying a bill and sorting papers on my desk. I
finally felt tired again around 8:00, so I slept for a couple more hours
then.
My throat hurts pretty badly again this morning. I really feel like this is never-ending! In spite of turning a corner yesterday, I'm still in pain and SO SICK OF BEING IN PAIN.
Day 12
Early:
On
Friday and Saturday (days 9 and 10), due to an increase of pain, I
don't think I ate at all, just lots of ice water. Sunday looked like it
would be the same, too painful for even eggs and if I have to eat
pudding or jello one more time I will die in protest.
At
some point, though, as I stared forlornly into the pantry, I noticed a
Box of muffin mix. I mentioned to Kriss that I thought I could eat a
nice, soft muffin. Shortly after, I smelled them baking. That is a good
husband. He even slathered two with butter and brought them to me while
they were warm. Soft enough to swallow with minimal pain, and SO
delicious... Blueberries are good for me, too, so BONUS!
Had
a nightmare, woke up at 1:00 am Monday morning, grateful for my pain
meds alarm, tasted blood, so I grabbed the flashlight and had a look.
I noticed blood in the healing area, (just a tiny bit) and got all
worried and worked up so I had to do some reading to make sure I was
still healing normally. Now I'm wide awake and not sure what to do about
it. I'm beginning to feel like this ordeal will NEVER end...
On
the left side, just a tiny, bright red spot -- not oozing or anything.
On the right, a dark red spot (small, but bigger than the other side),
with a small line trailing down. I can't see well enough to tell how
long the streak is. At first, I worried that it is oozing, but after
gargling ice water, sucking ice cubes, and sipping ice water for about
30 minutes, the spot-line is still there, but I'm not spitting any blood
now, nor did it visibly change. I suspect it's a small clot, and it
just has a tail. It's darker than fresh, bright blood. Fingers crossed. I
REALLY don't want to take a trip to the ER. Ever.
In
my reading it looks like some bleeding is common when the scabs come
off, and it looks like they are almost completely gone tonight.
For
days I've peeked back there and seen much white nasty coating, but now
it's mostly a tender red color. My uvula is slightly smaller, but still
swollen. Which is a ridiculous experience. Currently, because of
the sipping, probably, my pain is pretty low. I kind of dread going back
to sleep, though, because I don't like waking up and taking that first
conscious swallow to gauge how horrible the day will be.
I
realize I'm in the home stretch; this is the last worst part. Once the
scabs are gone, if there are no complications, I'm home free. Right? I'm
really looking forward to that glorious moment when I wake up for meds
and DON'T NEED THEM.
I'm so done with this experience.
In
the meantime, I've found some shows on Netflix that I've missed out on,
not having cable. "Dog Whisperer" made me realize how amazing some
people are, namely Cesar Milan. I doubt I will ever be like he is with
dogs. Whatshisname who helps people on "My Cat From Hell" has
simultaneously made me feel like it's okay to obsessively love my
kitties, while also making me feel bad about the old girl cat who lives
in the yard and garage since she refuses her litter box. But I have some
ideas to try to improve her life now. If I ever get better. And I
started watching the Duggar family on what used to be 17 Kids and
Counting. Wow. They are amazing, and their kids are remarkable!
We've
also watched every '80s comedy on Netflix that was suitable to show my
kids (So, Beethoven, Honey I Shrunk the Kids, etc.) and the classic
Cheaper By the Dozen and Close Encounters of the Third Kind. And loads
of other movies. I've watched hours of YouTube videos and slept a lot.
And I've even done a little reading, though not as kick as I would have
thought-- mostly because Percocet is brain-fuzzing.
Time
to go back to sleep. Hopefully no more nightmares and in the morning
hopefully I will wake to a miracle of swallowing normally...
Later:
Let's play "What's Making Me Super Dizzy Today? Is it- A- The fact that I probably only slept about 4 hours total last night and that was broken up into smaller chunks of time
B- I stopped taking prescription meds this morning and I'm sticking to that good old Ibuprofen and Acetaminophen rotation.
C- I had to get up and drive people around today and then get up a bunch more times to help my daughter excavate her room to find items to take to camp tomorrow, even though I should still be on "bed rest".
D- Loss of sanity from all this "resting"
E- All of the above
I have HAD ENOUGH.
This morning I stopped the prescription meds because I realized the pain wasn't any worse just on IB and AC, and that's a good step in the right direction, but I don't care. It doesn't make me feel any better.
I look around and my house is a mess, there's no food in the fridge and my poor hubby has to come home and figure out dinner AGAIN and I'm beginning to have panic attacks about money and the lack thereof and then the van won't start?? I'm losing my mind.
I suppose it's interesting that I'm feeling depressed enough that everything is starting to look bleak and hopeless. Maybe tomorrow will be the day that I wake up with no pain and I will feel like a miracle has happened.
But when will I get my strength back? I'm so weak and exhausted.
I keep reading personal accounts online that say you aren't back to "normal" until 3 weeks post-op. Super. In the meantime, what isn't being done? What have I neglected or forgotten?
OHMYGOSH. In this moment, I just realized why I'm probably feeling dizzy and weepy and sick. I forgot to take my anxiety meds this morning!!! GAH! It's 6:30 p.m.!!! CRAP. It's one of those meds that you can't miss a dose without feeling bad effects. I think I missed yesterday's dose, too!
Super.
Day 13
Dare I say "I think we've turned a corner?" Yes. I dare.
Although I don't feel anywhere near 100%, I feel much better than I have since this ordeal began. For one thing, my brain has stabilized, thankyouantianxietymeds, and for another, even though my throat still hurts, it's gone from mind-numbing, all-consuming torturous pain to a rather notable discomfort.
That's big.
So big, that I almost got out of bed and started doing lots of stuff today.
Then I remembered reading stories of people who did just that on the first day they started feeling better and then paid for it by having their knees buckle under them while at the grocery store, or by having a much worse day the next. So I'm doing a few things, but mostly I'm still going to take it easy, so I can truly, fully recover.
Last night, I slept in my bed instead of in the recliner. It took me a while to get settled and when I woke up at 4 a.m. for ibuprofen, my ears both ached a little, but now they feel fine. My pain in my throat level is probably only at a 1 or 2, and I'm still constantly sipping ice water to keep it there. I still have scabby areas and I'm not ready to eat those onion rings I've been craving, but soon. Soon soon soon.
I've been the recipient of such incredible love and generosity and kindness since my surgery, and I'm so very grateful to everyone who has brought in food and popsicles and sent or brought flowers an came to visit and especially for all the prayers on my behalf. I'm so glad I can finally see the light at the end of this ridiculously long tunnel.
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Day 14
My throat hurts pretty badly again this morning. I really feel like this is never-ending! In spite of turning a corner yesterday, I'm still in pain and SO SICK OF BEING IN PAIN.
I'm a baby, I know.
But seriously... can I be done now???
I
do feel well enough to wash laundry (my husband will be so glad!) and a
couple of other things. My kids have been really, incredibly good about
doing all the cleaning and even some of the cooking these last two
weeks. This is a blessing in disguise, because I've wanted them to share
cooking duties for a long time and now they have proven to themselves
that they CAN.
Blech. I need to eat something. Wish me luck...
Same day... later:
I took a long, hot shower, made myself a piece of toast (I keep reading that toast is good for the last bit of healing? Helps the scabs slough off? Hope so...) and a strawberry smoothie. Yummy and I feel SO MUCH BETTER.
Still a little pain, but less now that I'm up and moving a little. Maybe I'll go out into the sun for a minute. Although, it's Utah summer, so it's in the mid 90's today, so maybe not... I'm not heat-tolerant. :)
I feel like I've been on a 2 week vacation to Hell. But today, I'm almost home.
I
woke up at 5:30 this morning in quite surprisingly severe pain on one
side, took some ibuprofen and grabbed an ice pack, and within 15 minutes
of sipping ice water, I was much better. The rest of the day has had
only minimal discomfort.
Guys, I ate pizza last night. And today? I had half a nasty hamburger from Burger King. I hate Burger King. I'm still fantasizing about Crown Burger's onion rings...
I have a TON more energy today than I have since the beginning, and although I could use a nap, I've gotten quite a bit done today. My daughter is at Young Women's camp and while she's gone we are hoping to paint her room for her. She was promised a bedroom makeover for her birthday and it's time to finish up that promise. I'm hoping to surprise her when she comes home on Saturday. Fingers crossed! Today I cleaned the room and vacuumed it and moved the furniture out of the way (it was a disaster, it really has taken me ALL DAY to clean it. With a short 2 hour-ish break in which I was supposed to be napping but instead I watched "Pretty in Pink" on Netflix. Ah, the '80's.
So, happy happy happy day. The left side of my throat still hurts a little; I'm still taking OTC pain meds as needed, but they are needed less and less. And I'm still sipping ice water almost constantly, but it isn't painful anymore.
I will be home soon.
Praise the Lord.
This may or may not be my final entry about this ordeal. If you're getting ready to go through it, I wish you luck and I would tell you to hang in there. It WILL get better. Eventually.
Same day... later:
I took a long, hot shower, made myself a piece of toast (I keep reading that toast is good for the last bit of healing? Helps the scabs slough off? Hope so...) and a strawberry smoothie. Yummy and I feel SO MUCH BETTER.
Still a little pain, but less now that I'm up and moving a little. Maybe I'll go out into the sun for a minute. Although, it's Utah summer, so it's in the mid 90's today, so maybe not... I'm not heat-tolerant. :)
Day 15
I feel like I've been on a 2 week vacation to Hell. But today, I'm almost home.
Guys, I ate pizza last night. And today? I had half a nasty hamburger from Burger King. I hate Burger King. I'm still fantasizing about Crown Burger's onion rings...
I have a TON more energy today than I have since the beginning, and although I could use a nap, I've gotten quite a bit done today. My daughter is at Young Women's camp and while she's gone we are hoping to paint her room for her. She was promised a bedroom makeover for her birthday and it's time to finish up that promise. I'm hoping to surprise her when she comes home on Saturday. Fingers crossed! Today I cleaned the room and vacuumed it and moved the furniture out of the way (it was a disaster, it really has taken me ALL DAY to clean it. With a short 2 hour-ish break in which I was supposed to be napping but instead I watched "Pretty in Pink" on Netflix. Ah, the '80's.
So, happy happy happy day. The left side of my throat still hurts a little; I'm still taking OTC pain meds as needed, but they are needed less and less. And I'm still sipping ice water almost constantly, but it isn't painful anymore.
I will be home soon.
Praise the Lord.
This may or may not be my final entry about this ordeal. If you're getting ready to go through it, I wish you luck and I would tell you to hang in there. It WILL get better. Eventually.
I wrote this while I was up early one morning, sipping ice water: 5 Things That are More Fun Than a Tonsillectomy
and this on day 21: 10 Tips For Surviving Adult Tonsillectomy
