Thursday, November 8, 2012

The Four Cussing Levels

Recently I bought a new family computer. My poor old Mac Mini died beyond resuscitation and due to a depressing commitment to avoid debt unless absolutely necessary, I was forced to purchase a PC for the first time in 10 years. Within the first week of owning the PC, I became frustrated and spewed forth a mouthful of levels 2 and (I confess) 3 cusses. I decided it was time to share my impressive language organizing skills with the world. I can only hope the world is ready.


Level 1 Cusses:

Flip ~ dang ~ shoot ~ crap ~ dagnabit ~ fire-truckin' ~ crud
poopypants ~ flapjacks ~ heck ~ snap ~ fudge
 and various other mostly-innocent swears. We Mormons have a wide variety of Level 1s; tell me your favorites in the comments. Impress me and you'll win a random swag item!


Level 2 Cusses:

Damn ~ Hell ~ Ass
Also known as Biblical swear words. Mostly innocent, but really, we all know they're not.

Level 3 Cusses:

S***
I can't think of any other level 3s

Level 4 Cusses:

F*** ~ Anything involving the Lord's name or using God "in vain" ~ Words that refer to private parts, which I find particularly intolerable...

In a year or two when my new PC breaks down, I sincerely hope I am able to buy a Mac again. I miss it already... In the 10 years that I owned a (used) Mac, I never got as angry/frustrated/tear-splattering enraged at it as I did multiple times during just the first week of owning a brand new PC. Downgrading from Mac to PC is like having to retire your Honda that has given you 350,000 happy miles and only having enough money to buy a crappy Ford Escort. You know it will only give you a tiny time of happiness before it starts leaving nuts, bolts, exhaust pipes and various other car-type parts flying and flipping across the freeway behind you... 

Happily, I still have my (used) MacBook. I love you, MacBook!! Hang in there!!

2 comments:

Nancy said...

You are too funny. Even organized in your cussing. Love it!

Steph said...

Yep. But if you saw my house, you wouldn't think I was obsessed with organization. The truth is I've learned when to give up. :)